One of the simplest but often overlooked concepts is helping an individual in therapy get what they want. Therapists have actually taught kids how to request a hug and then given them a “high five” or a “thumbs up” or another reinforcement other than a hug. Sometimes therapists try to teach a frustrated client who wants/needs something, how to identify their feelings or deescalate without actually dealing with what they want/need.
Your priorities should be, (after safety, because safety is always first):
1. Help clients identify what they want.
2. Help clients request what they want in a socially appropriate manner.
Once this is done, there are three options.
1. They get what they want. No need for further reinforcement.
2. They get what they want at a more appropriate time/place. In this case it may be helpful to teach de-escalation/coping techniques and/or feeling identification (may need some reinforcement). The appropriate time and place must be made clear as well as what they need to do (if anything further needs to be done) in order to get what they want. When the person finally gets what they want, there is no further need for reinforcement.
3. They do not and can not get what they want. In this case, there are two things to consider and do. Teach coping techniques (may need reinforcement) and discover underlying needs/wants and teach alternative ways to get underlying needs/wants met (no need for further reinforcement when they get their underlying needs/wants met).
Click here for more information on writing measurable behavioral objectives
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